When I have a “freak-out”, I give myself the cool-off period to let the nerves flow back into their normal stream. After that, I reflect on why I freaked out, what made me freak out, and why I reacted to it like I did. I have to do this somewhere else though…

From time to time, I have to wander out where only nothingness exists. All is neither good nor bad when you disconnect yourself. It all just… is. You can’t reach me out here. Out here you can not fit in or be casted out. Out here, your existence is just enough. This is what I call the fringe. Standing on the fringe is to stand on the balance beam between the rest of the world & the emptiness of the other side. On the other side is what all of humanity dreams about. To some, the other side is where the conjured up thoughts of golden streets & lush waterfalls exist. To others, the other side is just a void space; the kind that our finite minds can’t imagine. The fringe lies between connectivity to the world & losing yourself into the unknown depths of the other side. I want to go to neither for the time being. I’m staying on the fringe, where I can meditatively come to my own assumptions about everything. If I step to close in either direction, all footing is lost on these plains of endless imagination. I say endless only because everything “just is” out here. No expectations, no pressures, no defining moments. Just zen. 

& I’m not even high. So don’t hit me with those juvenile weed jokes. :]

-MY•KUH